Oh, What A Feeling!
by xXMethereaperXx
Summary: When Richard's car finally gives up the ghost, he sets out to find a new one while showing Gumball and Darwin the value of being a master negotiator. Despite several complications, he find the perfect match!


Hello, one and all. My virus has finally spread to this series.

I've enjoyed this show since it's release (Teri being my favorite character), so I'm finally making a story in it. As of right now, I'm not planning on making anything other than this story here, though I do have several ideas for some. I'll wait and see if anyone likes my writing style before I go annoying everyone.

Anyway, on to this one shot.

Me being a car guy, I fell in love with the Wattersons' cars when after some research I found what they were modeled after, the station wagon being largely based off the older, Pontiac Grand Safari. So I started thinking, what if Richard loves his station wagon that he seemed to have since he was younger as much as, say, Al Bundy?

I doubt a lot of you remember the show, Married With Children, so I'll explain a little bit.

Al Bundy is an underappreciated husband who supports his family by selling woman's shoes to the obese for around $2.00 an hour. He's the epitome of the American working man of the 80's and 90's. His beloved, rundown car is a 70's Dodge (Actually it's an early 70's Plymouth Duster, but they refer to it as a Dodge), and though he always complains about his rusting hunk of American steel, he in fact loves his car considerably more than his children.

Why am I explaining this to you?

This story is inspired by my favorite episode, Oh What A Feeling, where he gets rid of the Dodge to buy a new car. I'm going to throw my own spin on it, but those of you who have seen it can appreciate the similarities.

So, I think I've explained enough, let's get to the actual story.

* * *

Richard sits catatonically on his couch, enjoying his fifth nap of the day when Nicole rushes into the room and shakes him awake.

"Richard, I need you to go to the supermarket and get some groceries."

Yawning loudly, he stretched himself awake, "Can't Samuel and Ronald do it?"

Sighing patiently, she shook her head, "Gumball and Darwin can't drive the car."

"Of course they can," he said as he settled back into his spot on the couch, "One can work the pedals, and the other can-"

He stopped and glanced up at the anger growing in his wife's face, the fear strong enough to force him off of his throne of relaxation.

"I mean, of course I will! Anything to help my loving wife," he said with a nervous laugh while he saluted and avoided eye contact.

The fury left her in an instant and she smiled as she handed him the shopping list and started back toward the kitchen, "Thanks, sweetie. Don't dawdle, I'm going to get started on the rest of dinner."

With his hopes of a peaceful rest shattered, he sighed and glanced around the living room, "Now where are my car keys?"

**[][][]**

"Cadet Darwin?" Gumball asks from behind the wheel of their dad's car.

Darwin salutes from the passenger seat, "Yes, Captain Gumball?"

"Engage warp drive!"

Darwin pushes several buttons on the dashboard and shouts, "Warp drive engaged!"

They begin to make spaceships noises while Gumball jerks back and forth on the steering wheel, causing the car to bounce and shake from it's spot on the side of the street. Mr. Robinson is busy washing his own car when he looks over and notices the movement.

"Warp drive disabled," Darwin notifies after several moments.

"Cadet Darwin, why did you disable warp drive?!"

"We're low on fuel," Darwin begins, pointing to the fuel gauge, "and have you seen the price of Atomic Starship fuel?"

"Right you are cadet, we shall continue in," Gumball pauses to add dramatic effect, "Ultra Efficiency Mode!"

Darwin gasps and shake his head, "But, sir, that's only a prototype! It's not safe!"

Gumball squints his eyes, "We don't have a choice."

Darwin gulps and nods, "Ok, sir."

Gumball inserts the key into the ignition and turns it forward, causing the dash lights to illuminate while the seat belt warning begins to chime.

"Ultra Efficiency Mode, activate!"

Gripping the shift knob, he strains to push it forward, several attempts proving him unable to.

"Aw man," he says with a sigh, "It's stuck."

"You have to push the left brake. I've seen Mr. Dad do it plenty of times."

Gumball looks to the floor and pushed on the clutch, "Left brake, engaged! Make it so, Cadet!"

Darwin saluted and pushed the shifter out of gear.

Instantly, their eyes widened as the car began to groan and slowly roll backwards.

"Uh, this isn't part of the game anymore," Gumball said.

"Well, what should we do?!"

They both looked to each other and shouted, "Bail!"

They dove through the door windows and it began to pick up speed.

Hearing the commotion, Mr. Robinson turned toward them, "What's all that racket?!"

Seeing Richard's station wagon approaching his beautiful, gleaming midlife crisis, he gasps and throws himself in between them.

"Mr. Robinson!" Gumball shouts, "Move out of the way!"

"No! It'll hit my car!" he shouted as he braced for impact.

Despite moving slowly, the car's weight proved enough to push him backwards. Straining against the force pushing him, he was able to hold off the intruding vehicle.

"Yay!" they shouted, rejoicing in Mr. Robinson's success.

Panting from exhaustion, he laughed, "I did it! I saved my car!"

Leaning against the front of his own car, he takes deep breaths and begins to recover his spent energy. However, the white convertible began to roll backwards.

Falling to the ground from the sudden movement of his resting post, he watched in horror as his car began to roll down the street in place of Richard's.

"My car!" he shouts before chasing after it.

The station wagon follows suit and begins to roll in the opposite direction, bouncing off of garbage cans and other cars.

Richard steps through the door in time to see it stop against a tree.

"My car!" he shouts.

"We broke Mr. Dad's car!" Darwin shouts as they watch him try to open the door.

Gumball scoffs, "Are you kidding me? After all that behemoth's been through, it'd take a little more than a low speed collision to finish it off."

Suddenly, the car bursts into flames, causing them to begin shouting and running in circles.

**[][][]**

With the car now parked in the back yard beside the shed, Richard struggles to open the hood.

"Come on!" he shouts as he strains against the latch.

Mumbling, he walks to the shed and opens the door. Counting to three, he slams it shut, resulting in the hood instantly rising to it's fully open position.

"How'd you know that would work?" Darwin asks curiously.

"Oh, it's always done that," Richard answers as he begins looking over the engine, "What were you guys doing in the car, anyway?"

"We were playing spaceman," Gumball shouts from inside the car.

"Space man? Why didn't you use your mother's car?"

"We did last week, this is season two. We needed a new ship, Mr. Dad."

Richard sighs and begins messing with loose wires, "Alright, are you ready Gumball?"

The horn honks loudly, making him head butt the hood out of surprise.

"That means yes!"

Darwin snickered while Richard mumbled and returned to his work.

"Alright, turn it on!"

"You better tell him to use the key," Darwin suggests from where he was peering over the front end.

"Come on, Gumball's not an idiot," Richard replies, pausing while he looked toward the driver seat, "Use the key, son!"

Several seconds later, the engine begins cranking over slowly, an unhealthy hissing echoing from the lower part of the engine. With a sigh he closes the hood.

"It's no use, that's a death rattle. I make that noise when your mother asks me to do chores."

"So, is the car dead?"

Richard nods, "Afraid so."

"What's going on?" Gumball asks while leaning out of the window.

Darwin inhales deeply and begins sobbing, "We killed the car!"

"No!" Gumball shouts as he falls through the window and runs to the front of the car, "It was so young!"

"Actually, it was old when I got it," Richard says, remembering him and his father working on it the day he bought it.

**[][F][]**

"I can't believe you bought this piece of junk!" he exclaims while shaking his head.

"Aww, it's not that bad."

"I don't even know how you're going to pay for this."

"Actually, the guy paid me to take it from him."

"Yeah, I believe that," his dad said with a sigh, "Hand me the screwdriver."

Richard looks to the workbench where a Phillips screwdriver and his dad's drink was sitting. Looking between the two several times, he can't decide.

"Which one?" he eventually asks.

"The one with orange juice!"

Richard hands him the drink which he gulps down.

**[][F][]**

"Ah," he begins, ending the flashback, "Those were the days."

Darwin sniffles and looks to the beat up and rusty car, "So, what will you do now?"

Richard sighs, "I guess I'll need to buy a new one."

"I want a Ferrari!" Gumball shouts.

Darwin shakes his head, "I want a Porsche!"

"Your wishes mean nothing to me," Richard said with a shake of his head, "I'm going to find a car that fits me perfectly!"

"Great," Gumball begins sadly, "A weenie mobile…"

"If I want a weenie mobile, I'll buy a weenie mobile," Richard proudly shouts, "But it'll be a new weenie mobile!"

Richard begins leading them to the house, stopping on the back porch, "This is great, now you two will get to see the master negotiator at work!"

As they enter the house, Richard slams the back door, once again making the hood fly open.

**[][][]**

Walking into the showroom of a car dealership, Richard clutches a battered and dirt covered shoe box with his name written on the top.

"Alright, boys, now you'll get to see me wheel and deal!"

"Were you wheeling and dealing when you traded the old car for a ride over here?"

"The point is," Richard shouted, "Negotiating with car salesman is the greatest skill to possess! Someday, you and Darwin will have to do it yourself."

Gumball crossed his arms, "Fine. Are you going to tell us what's in the box, master negotiator?"

Darwin slapped Gumball, "Dude, Mr. Dad is excited about this, can't you at least humor him?"

"Why?"

"Because, it makes people feel happy!"

"Alright," Gumball mumbled, turning to face Richard, "Come on, Dad! Tell us about your magic shoes!"

"These aren't magic shoes," he said, holding the box in front of him, "This is five thousand dollars!"

"Get it!" Darwin yelled as they began trying to take it.

"Get back, animals!" he said while raising the box over his head.

Finally getting them to stop he cleared his throat, "It took me ten years to save this! It's going towards a new car!"

"You don't work," Gumball said accusingly, "Mom works, so you pretty much stole from her."

"Well, what your mother doesn't know, won't kill me," he said while turning to look at the gleaming new convertible, "Now, look at our new car!"

They eagerly open the door and pile inside, Gumball taking the passenger seat while Darwin took the back.

"Dad, what's an airbag? The old car didn't have any."

Richard thought for a moment, eventually answering with a shrug, "I don't know, I guess it stores air."

"The car didn't have these things either," Darwin added while he tugged at the seatbelt.

Richard took a deep breath and sighed, "Just smell that new car smell."

Gumball and Darwin began to inhale, but Richard stopped them, "Alright, you're sucking up all the new. So, what do you think?"

"Well, there isn't really a lot of room for a spaceship."

"There will be no more spacemen in this car!"

"Aw, come on," Gumball said, "We finally have a plot for the next season!"

"If you wanna play spacemen, use your mother's car."

Seeing them playing in the car, the salesman walks over, "Can I help you- Oh, it's the Wattersons…"

"Hey! It's Tobias' dad! I didn't know you were a car salesman!"

Facepalming and shaking his head, he sighs, "Mr. Wilson will do."

"So," Richard asked, "The price says fifteen thousand. How much is it really?"

"Fifteen thousand."

Richard chuckles and steps out of the car as he gives them a wink, "We'll see about that."

Richard and Mr. Wilson lock eyes, Richard trying to assume control of his mind while Mr. Wilson stares back boredly.

"What's going on?" Darwin whispers.

Gumball shrugs, "Must be some kind of negotiating tactic."

"I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll give you ten."

"That's great," Mr. Wilson says happily, "But if you want the car, it'll be fifteen."

"Let's say twelve."

"Fifteen."

"Fourteen."

"Fifteen."

"Ok, but I want you to throw in a special air conditioning, no charge."

Mr. Wilson shakes his head, "No."

"Okay, then throw in a stereo."

"No."

"Undercoating."

"No."

"Okay," he said, pausing to think of something else, "But I'm not driving out of here until I get a wooden gearshift knob, no cost!"

"Let me think," Mr. Wilson says before walking to another salesman, "Hey, Mick, how much are those plastic wooden gearshift knobs?"

"Twenty five cents."

Mr. Wilson nods and turns around, "Tell ya what, I'll give it to you for fifty bucks."

"Deal, sucker!" Richard yells triumphantly.

"So," Gumball begins, his mind swirling from the confusion of what he just witnessed, "Is he teaching us to not do what he is?"

Darwin shook his head, "I don't know, but I feel depressed."

"How do you intend to pay?"

"How does a five thousand dollar deposit, sound?" Richard asks as he opens the box to begin counting the money.

"Hey, Gumball, doesn't that box look familiar?"

Gumball nods, "Yeah, I was thinking that myself."

**[][F][]**

"Quick! Anais is gonna destroy us when she sees what we did to her room!" Gumball shouts as him and Darwin frantically start digging a hole in the backyard.

"It was your idea to try out the fireworks you found in the attic!"

"Well, now my idea is to hide in the backyard until she forgets about it!"

Darwin feels his shovel hit something and pulls up a shoebox.

"Hey! Look what I found!"

Gumball takes the box and reads the first four letters of the word that's obscured by mud and grass.

"Rich," he says while he pulls the lid off.

His jaw drops and Darwin peeks inside, his own following suit, "Money!"

"A lot of money!" Gumball shouts, "We can use this to fix Anais' room!"

"Don't take all of it," Darwin said, "Leave some of it in there so it'll grow back!"

Gumball nods and places a small stack back into the box, "That's good thinking!"

They quickly toss the box into the hole and begin to fill it in.

**[][F][]**

Gumball and Darwin's faces drop in shocked realization.

"We took Mr. Dad's money!"

Gumball quiets the startled fish and rubs his head reassuringly, "Relax, maybe he won't notice."

"Hey, there's only eight hundred dollars in here!"

Mr. Wilson sighs and walks away.

"Kids! Someone took my money!"

Gumball gives Darwin the signal to be quiet, "I seen Mr. Robinson digging in the backyard awhile ago, said something about a score to settle."

Richard nods slowly, "That must be it! That'd explain how he got that new car!"

"So, what'll we do about the car?" Darwin asks.

"Don't worry, I have another idea!"

Richard jumps behind the wheel and turns the key, the revving of the loud engine echoing off the walls of the showroom. As he shifts into gear, though, the engine dies as the low fuel light blinks into life.

"Look," Mr. Wilson says, feeling embarassment for Richard, "Here's the address of a good used car lot. Tell'em I sent you and they'll take care of you."

**[][][]**

Richard pushes the battered and rust covered car to the curb and puts it in park, panting sweating from exhaustion.

"Hey, dad," Gumball says as him and Darwin walk out of the house, "Seen ya pushing the new car when we got out of school."

"Why didn't you help me?" he asks between breaths.

"The school bus had air conditioning," Darwin answers cheerily, "It's almost a hundred degrees out."

Richard sighs and opens the hood.

"It drove great when I first left, then it quit suddenly."

Removing a panel on the engine shows two hamsters on a treadmill connected to the transmission. As soon as the panel was removed, they jumped through the opening and began running down the street.

"We're free!" their high pitched voices shout

"Well, there goes logic," Gumball said while they turned and watched them leave.

"What do we do now?"

"Gumball, get the cheese!" Richard shouts, "No, wait a minute, I'll just take the car back and say I didn't like it!"

Gumball and Darwin look at each other sadly, deciding with a sigh to tell him the truth.

"We took your money!"

Richard blinks, "It was you two?"

Darwin begins sobbing uncontrollably while Gumball nods, "We destroyed Anais' room and had to fix it!"

"What?!" comes a faint, angry shout from within the house.

"Aww, come here," Richard said while he embraced his children, "I'm not angry about that!"

"Then why are you strangling us?!" Darwin gasps as the increasing pressure of Richards hug begins to deprive him of air.

"Because you're the reason I'm stuck with this orange!"

Gumball breaks free and begins taking deep breaths, "You mean lemon."

"Whatever!"

"Look, why don't we take this car back and while we distract the sales person, you can take another one?"

Richard shakes his head, "No, I'm going to negotiate myself a better car."

Gumball and Darwin look to each other and sighs, understanding that he'll most likely fail again.

"Okay, help me push the car back to the lot."

Richard looks at the ground as they begin pushing. Gumball and Darwin stop and walk back to the sidewalk, watching as he continues down the road.

"See? It's not so bad when we all push!"

Darwin sighs, "He sure is a dork, isn't he?"

"Now, Darwin," Richard yells, "Your job is very important, jump inside and hit the brakes when we get to the bottom of the hill!"

"Yep," Gumball says with a nod, "But he's our dork."

**[][][]**

Gumball and Darwin peek through the door when they hear the loud, revving engine. They reach the edge of the road when Richard pulls up in a bright, sparkly purple station wagon. The car resembles his old one, except for the lack of rust, dents, and different paint color.

"Well, what do you think?"

"You got a running car!" Darwin shouts happily.

"It looks like the old car," Gumball said quizzically.

"That shows how little you know about cars!" Richard says with a shake of his head, "My old car had three hundred thousand miles, this one has forty! This one's great, it fits me perfectly! The radio's even programmed to all the old stations I like!"

Richard spends a moment looking over the car, "Well, what did we learn, kids?"

"This car was only driven one mile a year?"

"No! We learned that nothing can beat a master negotiator!"

"And what did you pay for it?"

"That's the beauty of it!" he says as he hands gumball the paperwork, "It only cost me three years salary! Joke's on him, I don't work!"

"Then why is Mrs. Mom's name on the paper?"

Richard snatches the paper back, his face draining of color when he sees his Nicole's bank account listed.

"Uh, quick! Let's play, uh… Hide from your mother under the bed! Quick, before she gets home!" Richard yells while he picks them up and runs into the house.

As the door slams shut and the lights switch off, the hood of the car pops open.

* * *

Well, there we have it.

Not the best, I'll admit, but I think it's pretty good. I'll find a link to the show I based this off of and put it in my profile so you can give it a watch if you'd like.

Anyway, I'll put some more thought into what/if story I'll do next.

Thanks for reading.


End file.
